Recently I read a blog post from Anne R Allen about how well-intended loved ones can sabotage our writing careers. It clearly struck a chord with a lot of people for there were many comments and some sad stories were being told. Relaying my own personal experience made me realise that I was not alone.
When I told my mother, I wanted to write when I left school, she laughed at me and spoke with condescension. Since that day, despite the family knowing that I write and have had some success at it, they never ask me about it. It was the same when I was doing my University studies. For almost eight years, I studied part-time while raising a young family, and when I finished there was no word of congratulations; I was told that maybe now I could get myself a job. They would not be able to tell you what I studied, what my degree is in, nor how well I did, nor could they tell you what kind of writing I do.
This is why last year I began to set some boundaries and remove that level of negativity in my life. By doing so, it has been very liberating. It has made me much happier and allowed me to focus more on what’s important, such as writing.
Finding a great writing community (which for me is mainly on-line), such as the Insecure Writer’s Support Group, Romance Writers of Australia, along with various other individuals I’ve met over the years, has been a Godsend when it comes to helping me move forward towards my writing goals. If it wasn’t for these people and for having such a supportive husband, I would not be thinking of self-publishing. Instead, I would continue to write, but my life-long dream of publication would be forever lost.
I’m getting ever closer to hitting that ‘send’ button for my short stories before the end of the year. It will be a happy and very nervous time, but I will not be sharing that experience with my family; they’re not interested. I will, however, be spending that time with my husband, children and the on-line writing community; those people who love and understand what I do and why I do it.
This post is not meant to be a Debbie downer (I hate that use of my name), but to demonstrate that we are not alone in our creative endeavours. 🙂
Have loved ones sabotaged your writing? What have you done to remove negativity in your life? Have you managed to find your ‘tribe’?
The purpose of the Insecure Writer’s Support Group is to share and encourage. Writers can express doubts and concerns without fear of appearing foolish or weak. Those who have been through the fire can offer assistance and guidance. It’s a safe haven for insecure writers of all kinds.
Main image courtesy of Pixabay
