IWSG · This Writer's Life

IWSG: Becoming an Indie Author.

This month, for the Insecure Writer’s Support Group, my insecurity is on high alert. No, let’s be realistic. Make that extreme! My insecurity this month is on an all-time high because this month I become an indie author.

It’s going to take some time to get used to calling myself that. Despite blogging and being on other forms of social media, I’ve become used to being a writer with no real deadlines to meet or any form of expectations from others. Pressing that ‘publish’ button now changes things, taking it to a whole new level. Now that I’ve committed, I’m in it for the long haul.

And it’s being committed for the long haul that I know is something I can do. Pursuing a writing career has been my goal since I was ten and I’ve done everything I can to get to this point in time. It’s just the perfectionist in me that is having a bit of a struggle. 😉

When I take a step back and really give the situation some thought, what frightens me the most is what other people will think of my writing. Will they like it or not? This then evokes imposter syndrome. Having spent a lifetime surrounded by negativity, this is what I seem to be struggling with the most. Realistically, I know that what I write is not going to be to everyone’s taste and that’s okay; these people are not my ‘tribe’. The trouble is, I am worrying about something that is out of my control. When I stop thinking about that, everything seems fine.

Of-course I’ve thought about the marketing aspect of indie-publishing, but for now, I’ll be sticking with the ‘soft launch’. During this early stage, I’m still learning and there will be some trial and error while I continue to work on my current projects. Over the years, I’ve experimented with different social networks and have now come to stick with the ones I feel the most comfortable with. And this is what I’ve decided I need to do. Do what I feel comfortable doing and take things one day at a time.

My daughter has now finished school, so that marks the end of our school lives. Our household is now entering a new phase. It’s therefore, the perfect time to make the leap into indie-publishing. I’m experiencing a lot of different emotions – nervous anxiety mixed with excitement and relief. I guess I could be feeling like this for some time yet! 😉

There comes a time when one must bite the bullet and say enough is enough. That time for me has finally arrived.

Okay, when I’m not stressing, this is me!

My short story, The Ghost at Willow Creek, will be available soon as an eBook through Amazon. I will be posting shortly with further details.

If you are indie published, how did you work through your insecurities? When it comes to writing, do you worry about things out of your control? Do you tend to stick with what you are comfortable with?

The purpose of the Insecure Writer’s Support Group is to share and encourage. Writers can express doubts and concerns without fear of appearing foolish or weak. Those who have been through the fire can offer assistance and guidance. It’s a safe haven for insecure writers of all kinds.

Main image courtesy of Unsplash

IWSG · This Writer's Life

IWSG: Finding Support as a Writer.

Recently I read a blog post from Anne R Allen about how well-intended loved ones can sabotage our writing careers. It clearly struck a chord with a lot of people for there were many comments and some sad stories were being told. Relaying my own personal experience made me realise that I was not alone.

When I told my mother, I wanted to write when I left school, she laughed at me and spoke with condescension. Since that day, despite the family knowing that I write and have had some success at it, they never ask me about it. It was the same when I was doing my University studies. For almost eight years, I studied part-time while raising a young family, and when I finished there was no word of congratulations; I was told that maybe now I could get myself a job. They would not be able to tell you what I studied, what my degree is in, nor how well I did, nor could they tell you what kind of writing I do.

This is why last year I began to set some boundaries and remove that level of negativity in my life. By doing so, it has been very liberating. It has made me much happier and allowed me to focus more on what’s important, such as writing.

Finding a great writing community (which for me is mainly on-line), such as the Insecure Writer’s Support Group, Romance Writers of Australia, along with various other individuals I’ve met over the years, has been a Godsend when it comes to helping me move forward towards my writing goals. If it wasn’t for these people and for having such a supportive husband, I would not be thinking of self-publishing. Instead, I would continue to write, but my life-long dream of publication would be forever lost.

I’m getting ever closer to hitting that ‘send’ button for my short stories before the end of the year. It will be a happy and very nervous time, but I will not be sharing that experience with my family; they’re not interested. I will, however, be spending that time with my husband, children and the on-line writing community; those people who love and understand what I do and why I do it.

This post is not meant to be a Debbie downer (I hate that use of my name), but to demonstrate that we are not alone in our creative endeavours. 🙂

Have loved ones sabotaged your writing? What have you done to remove negativity in your life? Have you managed to find your ‘tribe’?

The purpose of the Insecure Writer’s Support Group is to share and encourage. Writers can express doubts and concerns without fear of appearing foolish or weak. Those who have been through the fire can offer assistance and guidance. It’s a safe haven for insecure writers of all kinds.

Main image courtesy of Pixabay

IWSG · This Writer's Life

IWSG: Are Your Fears Preventing You from Meeting Deadlines?

In August, my daughter and I were sick with the flu for some weeks and it wasn’t until I began to feel better that I began thinking of deadlines. The trouble is, despite my desire to self-publish, my fear has been preventing me from moving forward.

As someone who plans on self/indie publishing I have the luxury of setting my own deadlines. If truth be told, I have changed my deadline to self-publish a number of times now. I have been telling myself this entire year that I will self-publish this year and not later. I don’t want to put it off any longer. I have also been blogging about the prospect of self-publishing for a while now, so I don’t wish to come across as someone who says they will publish, but never do. I don’t want to be someone who is all talk and no action and sounding like a complete fraud.

To be perfectly honest, I’m afraid of pushing the ‘publish’ button and exposing myself to the world.

When I thought about deadlines, it also got me thinking about how much do we tell our readers? Mainly, is it better for self-publishers to give them a release date or announce our book’s release once it is actually up and running? If we give our readers a release date that we can no longer meet due to circumstances beyond our control, it could create problems. I would love to hear your thoughts on this matter if you are self-published.

Now that we’re in September (how did that happen?) and the year is coming to an end, I’ve decided upon a date (birthdays are always a good time aren’t they? 😉 ). Now it’s just a matter of sticking with it. The time for procrastination is over, and besides, I’m not getting any younger!

Does fear prevent you from meeting deadlines? If you’re self-published, do you prefer to give your readers a release date or give them a pleasant surprise? How do you deal with deadlines when life throws you a curveball?

The purpose of the Insecure Writer’s Support Group is to share and encourage. Writers can express doubts and concerns without fear of appearing foolish or weak. Those who have been through the fire can offer assistance and guidance. It’s a safe haven for insecure writers of all kinds.

Main image courtesy of Pixabay

IWSG · This Writer's Life

IWSG: Attending a Writers Festival.

Back in April, I mentioned that I could not afford to attend this year’s RWA conference in Melbourne. In retrospect, this turned out to be the right decision, as I had not attended a writer function in at least three years, so I needed to start with something on a much smaller scale.

Over the weekend, I attended a local writers festival, organised by my local library. There were five authors who came to speak about their books and writing, one of whom I had met ten years ago. In 2009, I was one of six successful candidates to attend the Write Around the Murray Festival, including a writer’s workshop with author and Associate Professor at the University of Technology, Debra Adelaide.

I introduced myself and our talk was brief under the circumstances. She told me my hair was a different colour to what it was back then, which I found to be an interesting anecdote. I mean, she didn’t remember my dazzling prose?!

It wasn’t until lunchtime, when I had mingled with other people, trying to make conversation, where I really began to feel insecure. After having been locked away in my writing cave for some years, with only social media my ‘go-to’ when it comes to socialising, I was definitely out of my comfort zone. I sat there, alone, wondering why I was there, but the answer was all around me. I was there to meet and listen to other writers and be with other people with the same or similar interests.

So, what did I learn from attending my first writers festival in three years?

• After ten years, I am still writing; it is something that I cannot be without.
• I believe my writing is better than it was ten years ago, even though back then it was good enough for me to win a competition.
• My passion for writing is what helped me to get out of my comfort zone, despite my insecurities.
• Mixing with other writers has given me the confidence to keep going and believe in my capabilities.
• Self-publishing/indie-publishing is the right path for me to take.
• When it comes to meeting other writers, I really need to get out more!
• Maybe I shouldn’t change my hair colour quite so often. 😉

What have you done recently to get out of your ‘writing cave’? Do you feel awkward in social situations? When was the last time you attended a writers festival?

Side Note: In the next few months I’ll be spending less time blogging to spend more time writing. As well as getting more writing projects done, I will also be focusing my efforts on self-publishing. I will continue to post for the IWSG, but otherwise, posts may be on a fortnightly basis. Thanks for your understanding and I hope you will stick with me. 🙂

The purpose of the Insecure Writer’s Support Group is to share and encourage. Writers can express doubts and concerns without fear of appearing foolish or weak. Those who have been through the fire can offer assistance and guidance. It’s a safe haven for insecure writers of all kinds.

Main image courtesy of Unsplash

This Writer's Life · Writing Process

How are Your 2019 Plans Going?

It’s difficult to believe that we are already over half-way through 2019, which is the time when one can sometimes stop and take stock of how one’s plans for the year are progressing.

For the past few weeks, thanks in part to the winter school holidays, I have been assessing my writing goals for the year. Some goals I have achieved, others I have yet to reach, while others have changed completely. Some of the goals I had made towards the end of 2018 have changed because I have changed. I have been reflecting on who I am as a writer and as a person; what my passions are and what’s important in life.

Previously I had talked about focusing on what we can control, as well as recognising the fact that I am a highly sensitive writer. I guess you could say that lately I have been doing a lot of self-reflection. 😉

Self-publishing is still my No.1 priority for the year, however, I need to remind myself that despite the enthusiasm for experimenting with different genres, I need to remain focused upon just the one for now. This early in the process, I shouldn’t get too ahead of myself and take things one day at a time.

There may be times when our smaller paths may change, but the destination remains the same. Sometimes we need to take a step back before moving forward.

How are your plans for 2019 progressing? Have you needed to take a step back and reassess your writing goals?

Main Image courtesy of Pixabay

This Writer's Life

Are You a Highly Sensitive Writer?

In last weeks post, I talked about not having to concern ourselves with things outside our control and concentrate on what we can control. As much as we can control our efforts towards our writing, we can also learn ways in which to focus on our physical and mental well-being.

For insecure writers, like myself, we have to undertake some form of balancing act when it comes to our mental health. We need to step out of our comfort zones occasionally and meet fellow writers, so that we don’t feel so alone, and yet, if we overdo it, rather than be a help, it can sometimes become a hinderance. We may begin to compare ourselves to others, feel inadequate and believe in that little voice in the back of our heads that tell us we’re not good enough. We then become reclusive and can sometimes get depressed. It’s a vicious cycle that doesn’t necessarily get helped by social media.

Last year I learned I’m a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP) and therefore I need to switch off more often than others. I tend to keep away from social media and avoid people both on-line and in the real world from time to time. I’m not being elusive or a snob, I’m doing it for the sake of my mental and physical well-being. There are times when we may need to switch off, avoid all the noise and appreciate the silence. So, I can really relate to this image.

And yes, I’m fully aware of how strange it may sound that a Highly Sensitive Person can also be a paranormal writer. Perhaps being Highly Sensitive is what helps steer me towards my interest in the paranormal in the first place. Maybe this is what helps me to pick up on certain things within haunted places when others cannot.

I have spent a lifetime believing there was something wrong with me, always labelled as ‘different’, but it’s good to know I am not alone in the way I see the world. Being highly sensitive is completely normal; it’s a trait and means that we’re observant, not weak.

If you think you may be a Highly Sensitive Person, you can do this on-line test by Elaine R Aaron, author of The Highly Sensitive Person.

Are you a Highly Sensitive Person? Do you often feel the need to get away from social interactions in order to recharge your batteries? What kinds of things do you do to help your mental well-being?

Main Image courtesy of Pixabay

This Writer's Life · Up Close & Personal

Do You Have a Pet as a Writing Buddy?

After eight years, the time has finally come to get another writing buddy of the four-legged variety. It has been something I had put off for a while because I just wasn’t ready and I never thought I would get another dog after our last one, Dana, had to be put down.

We got Dana as a puppy, back in 1995 and after my son was born, they were great playmates. Both my children grew up with her and I wondered how they would take the news. Dana had become disorientated, blind, deaf, walked into walls and sometimes would fall off the back ramp. She was going downhill rapidly, and I had no wish to remember her that way. My son, being the eldest, took it pretty badly, which upset me even more. The night we put her down he wrote her an epitaph on a piece of paper: ‘3/1/11 Dana was and always has been a good FRIEND’.

It took all of us a long time to get over it (hence the eight years), and with an awful lot of pestering from our son, we have finally buckled.

We now have another dog of the same breed (a Pomeranian) and is a male puppy, which we have yet to name. The first few days had certainly been a bit chaotic, and in all honesty, I wondered if we had made the right decision. I can see the same or similar characteristics with this dog as Dana had so it may take me a bit longer to adjust as she was my baby (yeah, I’m a big softie). Perhaps once we get past the toilet training phrase, things might get better. 😉

My writing routine has certainly been put out of whack, but I think (I hope) things are beginning to settle down. As my kids are now older and this is really my son’s dog, it’s good to know that they can share some of the responsibilities.

If nothing else, it’s a good way for me to get some writing breaks. 😉

Do you have a pet as a writing buddy? Did it ever take you a while to adjust to a new pet?

Main image courtesy of Pixabay